Pitch Wars Mentee Bio - The Amazingly Awesome and Alliterative Kimberly

I really wish my name started with an A right now.

Despite the title of this post, it's entirely possible I'm a bad person. There's a lot of evidence out there to disprove this theory. Like how I'm super friendly, believe all nice thoughts and compliments should be shared aloud (no matter the resultant social awkwardness), and the fact I'm a stereotypical apologizes-when-she-bumps-into-inanimate-objects Canadian.

Seriously. I did that less than an hour ago. Apologized to the wall I reeled into on my way to the bathroom. I'm awesome like that.

Anyway, I've been online since 1996 and the novelty hasn't quite worn off yet. Finding information on me is worryingly easy to do. But participating in the Pitch Wars contest has me thinking it's time for a "Hey! Look at me! I'm awesome!" themed post here on the ole blog.

Regular readers will have a laugh over that. Pretty much all my posts are about how awesome I am.

VanderVision Tip of the Day: You can be awesome anonymously, but getting the credit is a bazillion times more fun.

I like lists, so I'm going to do this bio in list form. I may add gifs and such like later on, but for now, it's all about THE WORDS.

1. I've decided I might be a bad person because I'm going to post the link to this bio here, where there are currently 98 bios listed. And I'm waiting till someone posts 99 so I can have the CENTENNIAL blog link. Yeah. Pretty egomaniacal of me, but there you go. Of course, 99 has it's glory too, like the always popular 99-bottles-of-beverage-of-your-choice on the wall song. And I'll probably grow impatient and settle for 99 if no one has taken the spot by the time I'm done writing this. But I will be DYING INSIDE.

2. Sometimes I used capitalization in a desperate attempt to convince people I'm funny. SO FUNNY. It's kind of sad.

3. I'm lazy. If I say something or write something, I really mean it. Insincerity just isn't worth the effort, you know?

4. The number one quality I prize in people is sincerity. Sure, I love finding funny, book loving, Dr. Who fanning, foodie people like myself. But if they're in any way fake at me, I get all, "Meh. I'm over you." This tracks back to a childhood full of false friends and betrayals, blah blah blah. I'm mostly over all that (except my lingering bitterness toward the girl in grade four who made me pay her cookies to be my friend). But as an adult, I'm all about being real.

5. Somewhat miraculously, despite number four, I actually have a lot of friends. This baffles me.

6. I might be lazy, but my obsessiveness always wins out over the lazy. When I decide to do something, for real decide, it CONSUMES ME UNTIL IT IS DONE. This is great when I'm writing, not so great when I'm trying to up my high score on Tetris. (Sidenote: I'm not allowed to play Tetris anymore)

7. I'm a Leonard-Level Geek, but I aspire to be a Sheldon. Enough said? Probably not. But this is a blog post topic all of its own.

8. I love people. As a kid, I was the shyest of the shy, and now I'm making up for lost time. I cannot get enough of having people in my life. Even my anti-social moments are about people. Reading about people, writing about people . . . I LOVE PEOPLE! I even love the dipwads and the morons and the jerks. Of them I say, "Some people are broken in a way that can't be fixed." Pity trumps anger for me these days.

9. I'm longwinded. Had you noticed?

10. I should probably end with some flailing and shouting. "Pick me! Pick me!" and things of that nature. Truth is, I'll be okay if a mentor doesn't. And for an obsessive egomaniac like me, that's a pretty big deal. But I've already got more than I expected out of this experience. A new CP, a bevy of new writer friends/cheerleaders, and so many heart-warming moments where I've been AMAZED by the compassion and support the writers in our community offer each other freely. It's enough. More would be nice, but it's enough.

If you want to know EVEN MORE about me. Feel free to click around the site. There's an About section somewhere, a link to my website (which is SO PRETTY), to my first chapter, to my Pinterest inspiration board. So much awesomeness. How can one mere blog contain it all?

Happy Blog hopping. Click here for more fabulous writerly types!


  1. I see how you and your writer friends are so close and it almost . . . ALMOST . . . makes me wish I was one too! But, seriously . . . I'm thrilled beyond words for you that you have this group and hope you'll get picked.
    I'd pick you! ;)

  2. Haha, I am that sorry-saying Canadian, too. *Shakes head in shame*. I swear, some girl about knocked me over in the mall a couple of years ago and I said sorry to her. What is wrong with us? :) You are awesome; good luck, Canucks, unite!

  3. #4. #4 just makes me love you more and I don't know how that's possible. Also, #7 just makes me geekily proud. I also aspire to Sheldon-hood.